20:16 - 2005-06-03
*GASP!* Survey
Only two hours till Kouji gets home.
Even though I feel better these days, I still wish I could be how I used to be. I realize that I probably would be more like I used to be if I would stop thinking I have changed. But I really have. I'm more "grown up" now. Or I'm having to try to be anyway. At first I worried too much about people getting mad at me, and not enough about getting 6things done, and now I worry too much about getting things done and I still do a bunch of things wrong. And not just in the screwing-up sense. I know I'm doing things morally wrong: whining, compromising the way I treat people, and blaming it all on being stressed out, then trying to play guru to the masses. That's another thing: I talk an awful lot, but I really don't say anything. I just spin off a load of audio. There's no passion being conveyed in any of it, I don't think. I just tell it how it is, and then wonder if I percieved and interpreted correctly. To relax: I think that's what will help. When you relax, you can truely feel the world around you, without having to reach for it. You see yourself, but you don't look so hard and you look at other things as well. You can truely be beautiful. All the loveliness in you can come out through every pore, in every word, in ever subtle movement...When I think like that, I stop talking about me though. I smile when I think those things. There's someone far lovelier than me. I snagged this from Jerky-chan (lunarlapine) who snagged it from someone else. I was thinking of doing something like this earlier, so it's been a bit...modified.But even though I snagged it, it's all still from me, so remember that and don't think "Oh that's what Jerky-chan must've put" like I did. I was stoopid XP
1) My uncle: Is in way more pain than I am...he won't be able to eat for a month...(they broke his jaw).
2) Never in my life: Have I shot anything living. But I probably could, if I was hungry.
3) When I was five: I had an imaginary friend named Batty who went to the moon. I was probably not really as happy as I think of myself in hindsight bias.
4) High school was: Reeeeally crummy at first. After that, it wasn't so bad, but it still wasn't over fast enough.
5) I will never forget: The number of my apartment in sixth grade(413). It's stuck in my head, alon with:Your birthday (419) and Pi (3.141592654).
6) I once met: The kind of angel (female) that young girls have written books about. And she liked reading books too.
7) There’s this girl I know who: Writes like someone who should be making some real money off her talent. *pooks at Jerky-chan*
8) Once, at a bar: Some people probably got drunk. ^_^
9) By noon I’m usually: Dressed and ready to sit around the house.
10) Last night: I stayed awake and listened to a beautiful rendition of Playing Warcraft III by maestro Kouji until it was "this morning" not "last night".
11) If I only had: A) lots of money or B) the ability to stop time. Money seems to relieve a lot of tension, and time stopping is just a good way to relax.
12) Next time I go to church, I: will see if I can change the settings on Firefox so that I can surf the web on the church computers.
13) Terri Schiavo: is the last thing on my mind right now.
15) When I turn my head left, I see: through the wall with my x-ray vision to the kitchen where the Food lives. Kouji is prolly also in that direction.
16) When I turn my head right, I see: the rainbox and the tub where I bathe the cats.
17) You know I’m lying when I say: "I remembered everything and it's all taken care of." But I don't think I've ever said that, or even thought it...There's always something I forget ^_^
18) What I miss most about the eighties: The music probably. That's all I can remember at the moment.
19) If I were a character written by Shakespeare, I’d be: fruity, loquacious, in love, then murdered, then resurrected gay.
20) By this time next year: I will be driving and hopefully more mentally comfortable, but not because of the driving. I will probably also be criminally insane, but it will be fun ^_^
21) This time last year: I was a year younger, and probably a little more relaxed. I should try to loosen up though, seeing as how I'm still hte luckiest person on earth.
22) I have a hard time understanding: how people can actually watch the disney channel....most other things I can understand, even if I don't agree with them.
23) If I ever go back to school I’ll: smuggle Kouji in somehow and take a picture with Mr Patton. And I'll put forth the effort to do well, but I won't be made a slave.
24) You know I like you if: I don't mind standing within six feet of you.
25) If I won an award, the first person I’d thank would be: my Kouji of course!
26) Quine, Kierkegaard, Bentham, Rawls: Fork, Slinky, Virus, Pogostick!
27) Take my advice, never: pee on an electric fence. Also avoid getting my dad riled up about something if you plan on living comfortably with him.
28) My ideal breakfast is: pizza. Aaaaalways pizza. Wiht cartoons.
29) A song I love, but do not have is: "Horizons" by the Kingsingers, and a lot of other choral stuff we've done over the years: "Out of the Stars", "Living in a Holy City", and "Ave Mari Stella".
30) If you visit my hometown, I suggest: that you go to six flags, eat, then leave quickly.
31) Tulips, character flaws, microchips & track stars: That's what nerdy, gay steroid-tumors are made of?
32) Why won’t anyone: go cow-tipping with me? Pleeeeeez?
33) If you spend the night at my house, don’t: expect to get any sleep.Cuz YOU get to sleep on the floor ^_^
34) I’d stop my wedding for: a look at a shiny gun.
35) The world could do without: the musical Grease. (I agree with Leah and Jerky-chan on this). But the world could do without sex offenders and mosquitoes too.
36) My favourite blonde is: Kouji! Kawaii kawaii Kouji!
37) Paper clips are more useful than: the paperclip on Microsoft Word.
38) If I do anything well, it’s: make people laugh without meaning to.
39) One decision that consistently haunts me is: whether I will drink milk or tea.
40) It would be funny if: my fortune cookie said, "Duck!"
41)As I always say: "Laughter is the band-aid that keeps reality from scraping against the wound that is life."
42)You can only be happy if: you pay your Misery Bill.
43)When it rains: I wish I could play in the mud...
44)I feel safe when: no one wants anything and Kouji is there.
45)The coolest animal is: the crocochicken. Naw, seriously, I like tigers.
46)It's really annoying when: Diaryland loses my entry that I've been typing for two hours. (But that didn't happen this time).
47)My favorite expletive is: "Sweet Mama in the Bahamas!" or "Holy Frijoles!"
48)I think most about: Kouji and whether my mind is doing what it's spposed to, along with the rest of me.
49)Most of all I want: to run away, have fun, and eat pie with the only person on earth because here is boring and stewpid.
50)And by the way: your mom eats tabasco on cake. OH YEAH!
